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Religion in the theatre, keep it clean. ;) - You don't know me. [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
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Religion in the theatre, keep it clean. ;) [Sep. 15th, 2009|02:54 pm]
randomposting
[mood |sicksick]
[music |Little Random coughing. :(]

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Caption contest. :)

And:

Every summer, Passion plays are performed throughout the South. These spectacles tell the story of Jesus using huge casts, massive sets and lots of special effects. In one production in Texas an actor playing a Roman guard was supposed to stab the actor playing Jesus with a spear that had a special retractable blade. Oops-- the guard grabbed the wrong prop backstage and poked a real spear into Jesus' ribcage. Jesus cried out in agony "Jesus christ! I've been stabbed!" The stage manager quickly brought down the curtain and called an ambulance. As sirens wailed in the distance, the curtain rose to reveal a new Jesus -- a 260 pound stagehand in a loincloth. When the time came for him to be lifted to heaven on special ropes, the new actor said "And now I shall ascend!" The ropes were attached toa special counterweight system-- that had been rigged for a man who weighed 100 pounds less. The stagehand pulling the rope couldn't lift him. He added more weights to the system as the actor repeated, "And now I shall ascend." This time Jesus was lifted a few feet above the cross but quickly dropped back down again. The desperate stagehand quickly put all the wights he could find onto the system and pulled the ropes as the new actor playing Jesus said, "And now I shall... AAAIIIIEEEEE!" "Jesus' " scream could be heard across town as he was catapulted straight up into the metal grid at the top of the theater and knocked senseless. Another ambulance was called and the show was cancelled.


What's your favorite stage nightmare that you've been involved in or had the pleasure of watching? ;)
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[User Picture]From: randomposting
2009-09-15 08:28 pm (UTC)
Thanks! I like it. ;) NPH is glorious.

And LOL, that caption rocks.

And I suppose it's not, but some can definitely be fun. haha. ;)
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[User Picture]From: docc
2009-09-15 08:44 pm (UTC)
1. Mom!!

2. Gramma was a crotchie, I'm a crotchie, my son will be a crotchie..

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[User Picture]From: randomposting
2009-09-15 09:30 pm (UTC)
LOL! YAY! I was hoping someone would see the similar pose. You rock. =)
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[User Picture]From: watergal
2009-09-15 09:15 pm (UTC)
Girl, that photo captioned itself so well, anything else would be gilding the lily!
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[User Picture]From: trish_punch
2009-09-15 09:20 pm (UTC)
If her lily were guilded, she wouldn't need the sign. ;)
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[User Picture]From: trish_punch
2009-09-15 09:19 pm (UTC)
I have two from college. In "Arsenic and Old Lace", I was supposed to slam the front door. I did, and I broke it. A stage hand had to come out between acts and fix it. And there was the rehearsal where I was supposed to slap Mortimore, and instead of missing him, I dipped my hand a little too low, connected with his cheekbone, and dropped him to the ground.

In "Little Me", my character was supposed to burst into a room, brandishing a gun. The scene was set around Christmastime, so there was a decorated tree set up right by the French doors I was supposed to burst in through. For the first show, the crew put the tree a little too close to the doors, so when I burst in, the tree toppled over. My first reaction was to point the gun at the tree. To this day, my friends tell me that I should have shot the tree.
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[User Picture]From: randomposting
2009-09-15 09:33 pm (UTC)
LOL! That's awesome!!!! HAHAHA! Rock on. I remember there being door trouble in the production of Arsenic and Old Lace I was involved in too. LOL. You and stage doors are not good friends. ;)
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[User Picture]From: gonepishing
2009-09-15 09:41 pm (UTC)
Hilarious picture. :-D

That story is so funny and sounds like it could be out of a movie or something. The scariest thing I've experienced on stage was when during "Sunrise, Sunset" in Fiddler on the Roof, the wedding canopy started swaying violently as if it was going to tip over. Now, this was in a very small theatre and if it had fallen forward, the first ten rows or so of the audience would have been covered by the thing! It was very hard to sing such a solemn song with a straight face while the audience was laughing their butts off!

The funniest was in One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest when someone accidentally flipped the switch backstage that closes the curtain, so during a relatively serious moment the curtains just started to close around us! Well, none of us on stage could keep a completely straight face for that one. It felt like such a bonding experience with the audience, for whatever reason.
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[User Picture]From: randomposting
2009-09-15 09:46 pm (UTC)
I thought it was funny! lol

And oh nooo! I hate when something like that gets in the way of what's going on with the song and the audience starts laughing. :(

And LOL about Cukoo's nest though. Whooopsies. haha. ;) Did Nurse Ratched at least keep a straight face?
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[User Picture]From: marguerlucy
2009-09-15 10:13 pm (UTC)
OK a) that picture is hilarious and needs no caption.

b.) this story was told to me by someone who says he was there - however, I think that it is actually just an urban myth. High school or community production of West Side Story, I don't remember which. End scene, when Chino kills Tony. Chino comes onstage. Chino does not have a gun. He must have forgotten or lost it. Chino runs up to Tony, kicks him in the shins, yells "POISON BOOTS!" and runs away.

Tony dies of poison to the shins.

Maria has to rework her last speech to be about Poison Boots. "How many kicks are left in these boots, Chino?? Enough for YOU? HOW MANY KICKS ARE LEFT, TO STILL HAVE ENOUGH FOR ME. WAAAAAH!!"

best story ever.

Oh also, have you heard that NPR reading about the most catastrophic production of Peter Pan ever? If not, I'll sendspace it to you if I still have it.
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[User Picture]From: randomposting
2009-09-15 11:03 pm (UTC)
LOL, I've heard of that West Side Story.. story. I'm guessing it's just an urban legend, but it's funny. :)

And I haven't, I would love to see it!
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[User Picture]From: skittish_derby
2009-09-15 10:16 pm (UTC)
i was in this play at my old church a LONG long time ago. before i stopped going altogether. and it was a christmas play, but it wasn't the nativity story. it was a story about a family right before WWII and their friends and the mailman going away to war and it was sad... but you know, had that god message in it too. and i played the young single woman who falls in love with the mailman.

but the church was not very technologically advanced (and not very large), so instead of letting us use our loudest indoor voices, they decided to borrow sound equipment from the local high school. the little mics were so cute, but also a complete nuisance. mine kept making that awful squealing noise. and the sound guy kept missing the cues for music, and i could hear the director practically shout at him (her husband) every 10 minutes when he would start a song too soon, or delay it a minute too long.

it was a fiasco. but it was still a lot of fun.
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[User Picture]From: randomposting
2009-09-15 11:05 pm (UTC)
Oh no! I hate mics. lol. Last show I was in that I had one it fell off at least two performances. Sooo stressful. Sounds like a good show though, the one your church put on. If it was a small location though it definitely makes more sense just to let people use their regular voices.
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[User Picture]From: itsjustc
2009-09-15 10:17 pm (UTC)
It's not really a nightmare but my village also does a passion play and one year I was playing Mary Magdalene (in the snow and frost and sub zero temps!) The field was really muddy from the snow and as I knelt down at the foot of the cross, an elderly lady stepped out of the crowd of the audience and passed me a supermarket plastic bag whilst whispering in my ear.
"Here you are luv. I don't think Mary would have liked to get her dress dirty even for Jesus!" LOL!
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[User Picture]From: gonepishing
2009-09-15 10:36 pm (UTC)
LOL irl
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[User Picture]From: harmonic_motion
2009-09-15 10:27 pm (UTC)
I dated a religious girl once, and I went with her to one of those passion plays. When they got to the part where they had Jesus tied to the cross, they lifted the cross up, planted it and turned away. But the cross slowly started leaning forward and when it became clear that Jesus was about to do a face plant, there was a moment where he was desperately flapping his tied-up hands, like he was hoping he would be able to break his fall. Luckily, the Romans caught the cross, and replanted it more firmly, but after seeing Jesus desperately flapping his hands like that, the rest of the show for me was just one long ordeal of trying to stifle laughter.
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[User Picture]From: randomposting
2009-09-16 12:24 am (UTC)
LOL, That's amazing. Omg. The visual is incredible.
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[User Picture]From: runeenigma
2009-09-16 02:36 am (UTC)
I really can't compete with the sign to give it a better caption!

Stage memories, wow, actually, most of the things that have gone wrong haven't been that bad. But when we were doing Comedy of Errors in a new amphitheatre, an enormous storm popped up out of nowhere and started knocking set pieces down, and lighting poles, too. I have a vivid memory of one set piece, a huge house with a curtain over the doorframe, coming down on an actor -- and miraculously, the doorframe landed around her, so she was still standing there with a stunned look.

The next Shakespearean play we did was The Tempest. We made sure to do that one indoors.
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[User Picture]From: randomposting
2009-09-16 02:38 am (UTC)
Oooh my gosh. That must have been really scary. Thank goodness it ended the way it did with the set not crushing the actor. Eep. And yeah, doing the Tempest outside is just asking for it. ;)
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[User Picture]From: ellensparkleyes
2009-09-16 04:48 pm (UTC)
no caption. the story made laugh so hard i cried. thanks for making my morning awesome :D
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[User Picture]From: randomposting
2009-09-16 10:05 pm (UTC)
You're very welcome. :) *hugs*
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[User Picture]From: sczrhands
2009-09-17 12:00 am (UTC)

Lights off

Caption: Teenagers today are confused by the abstinences adds of the past.

When I was in middle school and high school I had several friends who did a comedy improve show. At some point my cousin joined the group as a comedian and my twin brother ran the lights and microphones. One night we were at the show. A lot of my family and friends were there. Frank , the guy who ran the show made a derogatory joke on stage which at least 95% of the people there knew was directed at me. So my twin brother turned off the lights and sound. He kept them off for around 10 minutes while Frank groveled and apologized on stage. The crowed went wild and cheered. Improve at its best. The moral of the story is never upset you’re light and sound crew.
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[User Picture]From: randomposting
2009-09-17 01:39 pm (UTC)

Re: Lights off

LOL, that caption rocks. ;)


-- And that's awesome! Way to go your brother!
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[User Picture]From: randomposting
2009-10-14 02:35 pm (UTC)
LOL. Omg. That is epic. Saved for a future posting.
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[User Picture]From: kroker
2009-09-18 06:19 am (UTC)
:-D

thank you.

and hope you are both feeling better. x
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[User Picture]From: randomposting
2009-10-14 02:39 pm (UTC)
Thanks love. *hugs*
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[User Picture]From: tjoel2
2009-09-19 12:23 am (UTC)
OMG I think I see bush!
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[User Picture]From: randomposting
2009-10-14 02:41 pm (UTC)
LOL, you may.
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